.i don't want to do this anymore.

where am i?

`lately i've been feeling like i've lost myself. i don't feel as fun and crazy and over the top as i used to be and it's killing me. i don't know where that girl is and furthermore, i don't know when she left. all i know is that i feel bleh. and quite frankly, this bleh version of me sucks.

.yes i know that i've been growing and maturing and just like everyone else, i deal with things that stress me out but that shouldn't be the reason why i'm not like i used to be. -don't get me wrong, i'm not totally gone. i do have fun and i enjoy myself when it's time to, but it just doesn't come as fast as it used to. i'm upset that i let myself put everything that i've been through in the way of keeping myself happy.

`step one (and the only step that i have for right now) is to stop caring and worrying. i need to become care free. i think way too much about situations and that's what the problem is. if i just thought less then things can change up. i can't be dumb and not think at all and just allow anything to happen, but i need ot just go with the flow and get the fun out of it.

there's something bout this girl, from around my way.
`that girl is coming back. :)