.i disappear.

. so i'm the mistress! big surprise! NOT!!! and i just don't get it! why do guys want me only in that place! and it has happend to me more than once. i've either found out too late or too early but bottomline is i don't even get the chance to even be considered a potiential girlfriend. that hurts me soooo much because i've never been anyone's girlfriend. it makes me wonder what kind of female i am. how do i carry myself or present myself rather to give off the impression that i can't be taken for anything less of just something on the side. do i make your girlfriend appeal much better? the main course always looks better with something on the side. and i don't normally jump to conclusions, i think about all the reasons why it ends up this way. but it's a pattern. why talk all this, say all that when you should just come out to me in the first place. how do you feel speaking to your girlfriend knowing the things that you've told me and vice versa. when meeting me, do i have an aura about me that just reads, side piece? i mean i am thick like yams lol but seriously! i'll never know i guess.